A Comedy by Jeffrey Hatcher

THE STORIES: TELL-TALE is the story of Emil, the mild-mannered undertaker whose unspoken passion for a local real-estate woman who comes to all his funerals leads him to commit crimes and plot a way to confess his true feelings before time—and bodies—run out. THE THIEF OF TEARS is Mac, a beautiful Los Angeles drifter, who makes her living stealing jewelry from corpses. When her wealthy grandmother dies, leaving her nothing, Mac returns to her hometown and attempts to pry loose her inheritance, a diamond ring her grandmother promised Mac when she was a child. Her attempt leads Mac to find there are more obstacles to getting the ring off grandma’s finger than she had imagined, and more revelations about her own past than she had bargained for. THIRTEEN THINGS ABOUT ED CARPOLOTTI is the story of Virginia, the widow of a wheeler-dealer contractor, who discovers that her husband has left her in debt to the banks, her family and the mob. As Virginia struggles to escape her creditors and understand how her husband could have left her in such pain and doubt, a mysterious list of “thirteen things” embarrassing to Ed is offered to her if she can come up with one million dollars in three days. Virginia doesn’t have the money, but she does have hidden resources and is saved by an unseen benefactor. As the play ends, Virginia’s benefactor is revealed, along with what the mysterious “thirteen things” are—revelations that resurrect the love and trust thought lost forever.